I can’t believe it, she said, Josh just one-shotted a peach pie.
One-shotted? I asked.
Yeah, one-shotted. Like literally he just made it in one go. No extra steps or revisions.
Ok…
Try it, try it.
~
What the hell? This is horrible. This isn’t even peach pie. This is just like… I mean there are peaches and there is dough, and there is sugar, I guess. But it’s not even a peach pie. It’s just raw peaches and raw dough in a bowl. Wow this is disgusting.
I can’t believe you don’t like it, she said.
What do you mean you can’t believe it?! It tastes poisonous!
Do you understand that he one-shotted it though? She said.
One-shot or triple-shot or a million shot, this is vile. It’s literally not peach pie.
I mean it basically is, she said. Like you said, it has all the ingredients.
Yeah but the difference between “almost peach pie” and “actually peach pie” is like a lot of skill and knowhow and also an oven. And other steps. Not just one-shotting.
She sighed.
~
Later we talked about it again.
I’m still upset you weren’t impressed by Josh’s peach pie, she said.
But what was there to be impressed by?! It was horrible!
Well that it was so close to being a peach pie.
What do you mean, so close?
Like it was basically a peach pie. Just a few details would have got it there.
But those details are THE MAIN THING THAT MAKES PEACH PIE GOOD!! Sorry. For yelling.
Still it shows that Josh is really good. I mean he can get so close to a peach pie in one shot!
I don’t get it, I said.
No you don’t, she said.
~
I wish more people could one-shot things, she said, later again.
You do?
Yeah because then, well, then we’d have so much more good things in the world!
Would we?
Yeah, I mean, anything you could imagine would just come to life.
But… Would it be good?
Well it would be like Josh’s peach pie.
And is Josh’s peach pie good?
She gave me a weird look. Almost, she said.
* * *